Magical Spontaneity

Here's what I miss most about working full-time: magical spontaneity. Intending to create more magic into my day, the universe conspired to give me a boost.

Early this month I found myself doing a double wait. One wait was for my car to pass a smog inspection, the other was to cross busy Higuera to browse the thrift store. After a few moments I realized the house that I was standing in front of had a PSYCHIC HEALER sign posted in the front window.

I pretended to walk past, searching for an easier place to cross the street, but then I immediately retraced my steps, thinking 'what the hell?' and walked in.

I stood in a glassed-in porch that ran along the front of an old blue wood framed home. The first thing I noticed was the stack of "$15.00 Dollar Special" flyers with a phone number. Since no one came through the door that led to the house, I called the number on my cell. 10 minutes later I bypassed the Special for an in depth tarot reading from Kimberley. 

 

My personal history of tarot is: I studied tarot, practiced tarot, read tarot for others, was freaked out by tarot and stopped reading tarot. The reason I freaked was because after reading for several strangers, I realized that it was actually easier to read the person. That is, the cards were merely a place for the client to focus their energy.

Practicing the art of tarot taught me that when I pay attention to my intuitive energy, stay in touch with, accept and move through my emotions in a regular, conscious practice, then becoming an energetic reader of others is simple. But, I have to admit, reading for others was kind of exhausting. After all, I'm mostly interested in myself!

Having Kimberley read for me was a treat. Although I was given a hint of a positive future prediction, and I wasn't told anything I didn't already know, somehow I felt relieved, affirmed, and stronger.

Rediscovering magical, spontaneity means being aware of the roadsigns throughout our day: even if it means staying on the same side of the street.

Music Up Your Life

My March and April weekends have been filled with the final days of a weekend job, and spring cleaning. And now that I had free time, I intended to spend last weekend on To Do List tasks in between sitting on the fabulous patio.

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5/26/13: the fun patio with fabulous friends

Turns out my weekend worker warrior attitude was project schmoject. I did enjoy the view, but in between lounging, I found myself sorting through my music CDs instead.

CDs. You remember, those round discs that replaced cassettes last century.

Because I have an older car, I still have a CD player. While I'm all for iPods, iTunes, and Spotify there's nothing like a good old-fashioned CD. I like setting up the compartment in between the front seats with plastic envelopes that hold two CDs. I keep about a dozen favorite musicians, inspirational talks and my own latest music project to accompany me on my 1/2 hour drive to work. It's being on a mini-vacay, twice a day.

Recently, I browsed music at Boo Boo Records in downtown San Luis Obispo to replenish my commute collection. It reminded me of the weekends when I was a teenager, hanging at the record store with friends, searching for albums and okay, 45's. Afterwards at home, I'd read the album cover and lyrics while listening to my new find.

While it was lovely to browse and dig through all of the music possibilities, as it turns out, I was taking care of my spirit in more ways than one.

According to Huffington Post columnist Kate Bratskeir, "people who simply listened to music had the same decreased anxiety symptoms as those who got 10 hour-long massages. Choosing the right tunes could be an important factor, however, as a happy or sad song can also affect the way we perceive the world." 

(Full article at The Daily Good)

Though it's only Tuesday, I'm already excited for my weekend. In between lounging on the patio, I'm going to make a new playlist for my iPod.

The Procrastination Blues

Since I've been settled into my new working life, I've been doing my best to avoid completing a creative project. I kept telling myself I was too busy, too tired, too stuck to move forward.

But now that the DVD player in my computer needs replacing, I've renewed my commitment to the project's completion. I told my vision support group that I'll work on this task for 10-minutes a day,  minimum.

The point of 10 minutes is take tiny steps toward completing a task  Because of the short time limit, I generally work past the alarm. However, if I've had an especially long day, 10 minutes is all I need to tell myself, 'there, today I spent time moving forward on my dream.'

Wednesday evening I worked for one 10-minute session, but now I'm back to avoiding. So many inspiring books, so little time.

I recently ran into a creative acquaintance at Trader Joe's. I hadn't seen him for several years. After catching up, I told him about my procrastination.

"I think I was hoping it would turn out better. I'm disappointed that it isn't perfect."

He could relate.

A different creative friend who has launched many projects responded,

"Liking your own project isn't the point. But now that you've invested so much energy, it's time to just get it done."

I guess I can re-name this blog The Perfectionism Blues.

Now that I think about it, I got this far on the steady eddy method. In fact, the project was completed during my house-hopping stint.

So, if I didn't even need stability to get to this point: I'm not going to allow a little stability stop me now.

How do you move through the procrastination blues???

 

If Shackleton Can Do It

It's February 27, 59 days into your New Year's resolutions and it's time for a check in.

By now you've created a new habit, and that habit needs an energy boost. Being a regular intention-setting gal, I recharge by thinking about my favorite inspirational warriors. When I find myself chanting under my breath, “If Shackleton can do it, I can do it,” it's definitely time for a quick review of my hero's bio.

Ernest Shackelton was an explorer famous for his failure to find the South Pole. It was the early 1900’s. Though their ship, The Endurance, got trapped in pack ice, broke up, sank and had to be abandoned; under Shackleton’s leadership, all of the men survived and returned home safely—one year later.

The Endurance photo by Frank Hurley

In her book, The Endurance: Shackleton's Legendary Antarctic Expedition by Caroline Alexander, page 94 offers this quote by one of expedition members, Macklin,.

“As always with him what had happened had happened,” Macklin wrote. “It was in the past and he looked to the future without emotion, melodrama or excitement. He said, “Ship and stores have gone, so now we'll go home.”

Basically, the crew's survival came down to this:

1. They did not get caught up in the story of the tragedy.
2. They established a routine of work and physical activity to keep the monkey mind at bay.
3. When the work was done; they played music, sang songs or ran around on the ice.

It's easy to abandon my intention to take the next step if I've had a lousy/grueling/long/stressful day. It's hard to unhook from an emotional day and allow the present to inform my next right move. But if Shackleton can do it, then I can do it. If Shackleton can do it, then I can do it.

Who is your inspirational warrior?

The Muddy Moment

My latest re-read is the book My Stroke of Insight by Jill Bolte Taylor. She is the brain scientist who had a massive brain hemorrhage. Her book documents her journey as her left-brain facilities shut down during the four-hour time period of the stroke. She fully recovered and now travels and speaks about her insights. My biggest insight has been how diligent she was in her self-care. In order to heal completely, Jill studied the affects of daily routines that zapped her energy. This section fully caught my attention. Because I am working more scheduled hours than I have for a long time, I'm struggling to recapture my spontaneity.

I've discovered that spontaneity is not how many moments I've collected for down-time: it has to do with simply being present. Being present is being available for spontaneity, which leads to insight, joy and deep satisfaction. In chapter 13, What I Need Most, Jill noted that one of the biggest energy zappers was the constant storytelling of the left brain. As a writer, I always believed that zoning out on stories and imagery was kinda good. But upon reflection, I realized that most of the left brain's stories had to do with whether I was doing enough, earning enough or good enough. When I began listening in on the rhetoric, my first thought was 'Enough!'

Photo from www.theabundantartist.com

Now when I hear my left brain gearing up for another long tale of enough-ness (where I always come up short) I simply imagine it standing behind a tiny, yet effective plexi-glass wall in my brain: I can see its lips move, but can't hear what it's saying. Next, I direct my brain to lecture at a podium beneath a giant sign that reads “Storytelling.” The sign is one of many. Other signs read “The Worry Monger,” “Fear Is a Wild Pig” and “Why I Should Be Master of the Universe Even If I Don't Own a Smart Phone.”

 With my left-brain busily engaged, I am now free to focus my energy on the present. Not surprisingly, I've found my week peppered with spontaneous pockets of joy. One was laughing as a young man in a cow suit strutted down the sidewalk on Santa Rosa advertising the Cowgirl Cafe. Another was glancing at the ocean at dusk and spying the sliver of the new moon. Still another was the moment after successfully wrestling a sprinkler from the mud that the boars had buried several inches deep. It was 7:30 am on a crispy morning, my pants were soaked, my knees felt creaky, I had citrus leaves in my hair and mud splattered on my face, but I felt alive and energetic and so appreciative of my nutty life. So this year, I'm not aiming for any specific resolution or even evolution. This year, I'm all about the sweet, muddy moment.

Extreme Pet-sitting

December 19, 2103.

Yesterday I finally accepted my busy future fate and surrendered to one 40-hour per week job (starts January 16) plus two part-time jobs. For the past week I had flung myself around the house in full martyr mode, bemoaning my fate. I had called four friends trying to gain sympathy, but no dice. Each one talked about a time in their life that was extremely busy. All four were positive and saying peppy things like, “I worked six days a week for three years because I wanted to build my retirement,” “Well, I have to work hard during the busy season,” “Make hay while the sun shines,” and "I was so busy working that I didn't have time to spend money."

Fine.

Once I got over myself, I decided to work in the main house where there is an Internet connection. (I am caretaker at a ranch that is for sale and live in the cozy detached guest house.) I opened the door and saw five cows grazing on the pristine lawn in front of the house. They were escapees from the neighboring ranch. I set down my computer and rushed toward them, clapping and shooing. The last cow stood still, looking at me with bovine indifference. As I herded them up a small slope I quietly told them how much happier they'd be once they were home with their other cow friends. They moved up the slope and I scooted by them and opened the gate. I waved my arms in a forward sweeping motion. They didn't budge. I climbed the hill behind them and rushed at them again clapping and shouting. All five scurried neatly through the gate.

I call this extreme pet-sitting.

This happened 10 days ago. Finally I trust that I am headed the right way into a full working life. I see my Higher Power standing ahead of me, coaxing me forward. This is the big difference between how my HP does things and how I do things. My HP coaxes me, I herd myself. My HP stands a few yards ahead of me, waving me on.  I stall and try to garner sympathy from friends and waste time gnashing my teeth, drinking a little too much wine and watching too many TV series, but so what? 

My question is: how do I stay awake during this process? How do I take my poetry heart, which requires vast empty space and keep it open as I move through my very scheduled days? One step here. One breath there. I don't always feel that happy about where I am being led, but by now, I trust where I am being led.

http://www.ecouterre.com/maryland-scientists...

This season I've had to forgo lots of holiday events in order to take care of myself as I juggle three part-time jobs. (I still am slightly worried about my writing time when one of the jobs gratefully goes full-time.) I've been happy to stay home with two pet-sitting charges: a dog named Sammy and a cat named Jimmy, both female. We hang out in my snuggly room with my Pic N' Sav tree and listen to Xmas music. I love Xmas music. On Xmas morning I lit the wood stove and danced in the kitchen to a Xmas mix I created in 2008.

Recently, while I was watching Downton Abbey in my room, I felt my HP calling me inside the big house. I searched for lights left on, water running then I thought a work-related phone call would be returned. Instead I looked out the large kitchen window and saw a rainbow. I stepped outside onto the patio. One end was bright, shimmery, yet subtle and seemingly anchored to the earth. I walked down into the field for a better look. The center of the rainbow was pale, barely perceptible as it arched over the orange groves like a gentle, sweet promise and disappeared behind the hills to the east.

Laughing at the Turkey Table

This season, I'm appreciating being from a fun AND funny family. Mom seems to be the ringleader: our history is filled with stories of her antics. One is that after she caught my older brother and sister playing with an unauthorized water balloon, she demanded they give her the balloon. They tossed it at her, she caught it and ended up swinging it around her head before launching it at them. Of course they got wet. And of course this was done in the front yard for all the neighbors to see.

Since beginning a great new job, continuing with my caretaker job at a ranch and other commitments, it's been easy for me to get overwhelmed. Happily, I've discovered that laughter is the best remedy. 

If things are getting too serious at the turkey table, excuse yourself and check out my favorite funny/fun Internet distractions.

1. Flight of the Conchords: Funny tunes
2. Nashville: Fun music drama
3. Shea Hembry: Funny Ted Talk
4. Emergency compliment: Fun pick me up
5. Help Desk: Funny video
6. Nina Katchadourian: Fun artist
7. Light Up Sheep Art: Funny do-it-yourself project
8. Sandra Saenz: Magically fun blog
9. Ellen Degeneres: Funny hidden camera pranks
10. Playmobil Security Checkpoint: Funny Amazon product reviews

If you still need convincing, check out this serious link from the Mayo Clinic on why laughter feels so good.